A doctor or our own brain says it is ok to eat certain foods because of another problem that could be related to a side effect from medicine, is that OK? Do we tell ourselves I am going to have a high carb food, but I am also eating a lean protein such as grassfed meat or fish, it will balance out, is this logic, OK? My endocrinologist told me this week to just give myself another unit of insulin if I eat the type of foods that seem to only work with the nausea and the increasing migraine that was building up. This was my logic for dinner yesterday. I absolutely convinced myself it was OK because my endocrinologist said to just use more insulin. Is this the mindset of doctors and specialists? Is it because they just do not care or have to push patients quickly through because of time, over booking, and/or we are droning on and on? I went to an endocrinologist because my Primary Care Physician just was not helping with some of the diabetes crap. I really want to reverse my secondary type 2 diabetes because I hate the medicines I must take. Turns out after this week’s visit, they are both the same. PCP said see the endo because your A1c has increased, not good. Endo said it really is not that bad, just increase the insulin. Don’t doctors want us to get better, heal?
I did so well this week eating keto style meals. I made my favorite Keto foods to keep the cravings under control. I made a few Chaffle sandwiches. A chaffle is like a bready type of consistency that is low carb and the latest keto craze made with one egg, two tablespoons almond flour, ½ cup shredded cheese of choice mixed in a bowl and poured onto a mini waffle maker. They helped. I made mashed faux potatoes using cauliflower, always a huge favorite. I created a keto childhood favorite, sloppy joes. Then on Sunday, I ate rice. I was not feeling well. It was not that serious or out of control. I managed the nausea and migraine all day with Saltines and ibuprofen. BUT I told myself, I will just give myself another unit of insulin because the endocrinologist says it’s OK. The cooked rice tasted extremely sweet. It was so good, and I instantly wanted more and more. I made an Asian stir-fry salmon with coconut aminos (overly sweet because I spilled at least a 1/2 cup of the coconut aminos on my salmon) to eat with the rice. I did not care at this point. I didn’t do portion control, I told myself I did not have to because I am doing more insulin tonight. I have permission from my endocrinologist. This morning, guilt set in. I am bloated today. My sugar is high. AND the extra unit of insulin did not keep the sugars under control, so the endocrinologist’s advice was not 100% accurate.
This type of behavior has been going on for years. There are times when I do so well, I feel I have beaten my food addiction. Then something happens that overrides the logic and all that challenging work, I crash and go through this up and down roller coaster of emotions that I cannot control. I talk to my sister or a friend, they yell NOOO don’t do it! That does not help. It is yelling, not convincing, nor encouraging. I think about when I coach others. I always say to them, let’s talk about it, try a “comfort Keto dessert” like Keto ice cream a much better carb count 6 net carbs vs the 90 carbs I inhaled yesterday, let’s address the issues, try other remedies like doing art, going for walks, doing a craft etc. Why is it that I cannot apply this logic to me?
I know all about WILLPOWER. I quit smoking cold turkey in 1996. I never once cheated. I conquered a horrible habit. My other major addiction was diet coke. I started drinking diet coke when I saw my roommate drinking it around 1986. I used to drink Coke, the kind that came in bottles, the best. I was constantly being told I was fat, overweight, but I really was not. I was into softball, biking, racquetball, lifting weights, and tennis, it kept me lean. I turned to diet coke. I would easily drink a 12-pack of diet coke a day, from the time I woke up, to the time I went to bed. The smoking and drinking diet coke went on for years including during the Multiple Sclerosis diagnosis. No doctor or neurologist told me that I was accelerating the disease. Smoking was the biggest thing that I was told to stop.
I quit drinking and eating any food or drinks that had aspartame in it in around 2004, nineteen years ago after I read this book written by Kevin Trudeau – Natural Cure “they” Don’t Want You To Know About. In the book, Trudeau wrote about there are all-natural cures for serious illnesses including cancer, herpes, arthritis, AIDS, acid reflux disease, various phobias, depression, obesity, diabetes, multiple sclerosis, lupus, chronic fatigue syndrome, attention deficit disorder, muscular dystrophy. The FDA, FTC, and major food corporations hid from the public for years the dangers of many preservatives, additives, artificial sweeteners. The public had huge debates, yelling, and controversies about his book. Eventually, he was sued and considered a fraud. He claimed that the source of illness are toxins from processed food, nutritional deficiencies, and other environmental sources. If these factors were eliminated it would cure most of these diseases he wrote about. This book was written in 2004. What is REMARKABLY interesting, this year, 2023 the WHO organization claims artificial sugars, aspartame change a person’s DNA. What about other crap? He truly was not wrong! Other highly well-known and credential people, doctors, have published research papers and books about the very same thing he wrote in 2004.
I was so upset when I read this book. My thoughts just raced. I convinced myself that I accelerated the MS symptoms from drinking diet coke. I never cheated or went back to this terrible addiction. If I did have a sip, it was because a restaurant gave me diet coke and I immediately knew it was awful tasting. I would drink a ton of water to flush it out of my system. When I see family members, especially those with serious health problems drink and eat foods with artificial sweeteners I just get so perturbed. I have WILLPOWER. I know what it takes to be strong and fight addiction.
Why can’t I do this with food?
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